First Week of School

The first full week of school is over. Now I know why when I was a kid why people would riot in the heat. My classroom’s windows were painted shut and we have no air conditioning. The temperature rose to the balmy, deodorant-free ten year olds, ninety-five degrees. There was one point where it looked like the Poseidon Adventure as I stood on a bookshelf banging on the window, trying to free it us from the Benjamin Moore fashioned prison we were in. If I had an alternate site, I would have used it.

I also made one boy cry five times this week, I think it has more to do with something outside of school than me being a bastard, although being a bastard is a cross I gladly bear. Once one kid cries in class it opens the rest of them to inflict emotional outbursts at will. It is a liberating threshold we have to cross. I have never cried in school, as the teacher.

In a departure from the past two years, my fifth grade has more than one girl in it. Fifth grade being the terminal grade at our school leads us to the problem of having a “Lucy” from Peanuts if we have one girl in Fifth Grade. Last year we had a benevolent dictatorship, the year before we had a horrible bully. This year I have two girls and I thought we would have a power struggle, but we have a power vacuum instead where we have no one in charge of the playground, socially, and all the authority on heaven and earth has, for some reason, been ceded to the teachers, of all people.

This cuts into our gossip time as a staff. I prefer this, although my recess duties have been filled with tying shoes, applying bandages and breaking up arguments. I do not have physical fights in my school, my first year someone raised their fist at another child and I said, without thinking as per the status quo, “You hit him and I swear it is the last thing you will do.” Sometimes, according to Carol Smith, the students thinking that you are crazy is to your advantage.

I also do not have a class clown this year; I have a comedy troupe. I have four students (out of nine) who think they are comedians and they have an ongoing routine that amuses the other four (our ninth hasn’t arrived) and keeps them off task. This is better than last year when I had a student plotting to kill me. I remember him telling me, “you’re a bastard. I am going to destroy you.” More than Harry Potter, I am the boy who lived; some kid was not going to destroy me. This year, I have no oppositional children. This year should be a breeze.

New features to this site include the syndication of my photography, as well Alex Vance and Tiny Elvis’ photography.

Comments

[purple chai]

Students thinking that we're crazy is one of the most powerful weapons we have.

[Suburban Island]

It sounds like a class that will yield some interesting diary entries.

[Margaret]

You have some interesting children and great blog "fodder."

[Yvonne]

Looks like you have great kids and a fun school year ahead of you!